The Thrill of Victory... over What?

"A creative man is motivated by the desire to achieve, not by the desire to beat others."  -Ayn Rand

The 20th century philosopher and intellectual giant Ayn Rand and I do not agree often in terms of how we view the world, but I found this quote to be powerful, in the spirit of resurrecting my blog.  Think about the last time you made a goal.  What was the payoff to achieving it?  Did you believe for one moment that it would make you better relative to someone else, or better overall?  Do you find more satisfaction in beating others in competition, or in simply bettering yourself relative to yesterday?

Tonight (~1:30 in the morning) I reflect on this very idea.  Why did I start this blog back in August?  What caused me to lose focus and practically abandon it?  At this point in mid-November, have I really made myself into a "better man?"  If so, relative to what?  

To answer this question, I looked at why (again) I really wanted to undertake this project.  I stopped making judgments over my progress in early October, largely because I had convinced myself that I was too busy to write or take better care of myself.  Reminding myself of the goals tonight, however, made me feel ashamed.  These are legitimate goals:  for instance, dropping 25 pounds and running a few times per week is essential to making a smooth transition to living in Bogotá because it is easier to adjust to higher altitudes when in shape.  I'm also trying to control my weight for the sake of my joints in the long run, as well as my back.  It's going to be a lot easier to get up in the morning at 200 pounds than 225.  

Spiritually speaking, I'm still looking for that renaissance.  Though I've been going to church on Sundays, I'm still looking for the key to deepening my personal spirituality.  Books and stories are great, but they wear off over time.  Routines get stale.  My goal for the month of November is to make it back to confession, something I did last September.  A good penance sorts out my mind, as long as I don't do it too often.  If anyone has any recommendations for books I can read (gradually), feel free to drop a comment on my post.  

Over the next week, I'm going to continue to focus on inspirational quotes and philosophers.  Each one will come with an idea that I either agree or disagree with, and I will try to relate them to my pursuit to become a "better man."  Per Rand, I gained from this quote the concept that a victory is not going to come from doing better for someone else.  I don't try to get good grades because I want to do better than my colleagues:  the point is to do better than I did last semester.  The point of getting into shape isn't to be better-looking or in better shape than people around me:  it's to make myself better off in the long run.  Spiritually, I will always acknowledge that I am among the worst of sinners, and that each step I take in the right direction is but one of a thousand that I should be taking.  Ms. Rand is right in this regard:  we should be focused on achievement, not beating the person next to us.  Take that thought into consideration as you push for something great this week.  Have a look at the video from Brian Tracy below if you (like me) are in the market to develop good habits once again.  Take care!